Where Are We?
The world is a strange place right now, more than ever. And educators want to help. We try and find ways to support students and their families through the difficulties they may be experiencing. We need to be mindful of many things before, during and after our interactions in these endeavours.
Important…
This is the word that came to mind when I saw this video shared on social media. Scrolling through a screen I discovered “Communicating with Families Through a Trauma-Informed Lens” at https://etfopley.ca/pley-chats.
“Educator Christine Galvin shares important elements of her approach to building meaningful partnerships with parents through a trauma-informed lens” the post said. I found the explanation accompanying the link to be very thoughtful as it invites educators to think through a variety of aspects while engaging with the material.
Let Us Examine Both Intention and Impact
Sometimes the best intentions can have unintended impacts. So it is with trauma informed work, and it becomes important to develop a mindset that allows me and you to step away from taking things personally and asking “What did I miss here? What do I still need to learn?”
I weighed out the pros and cons of consuming content in our busy, under-resourced work lives if we do so without critical self reflection.
My Stories Are My Stories
When reaching out to families, students and even colleagues whose experiences we think will help us understand others’ better, it is important to be mindful of intention and impact.
It is also very important to remember and understand that no one owes us their stories.
- To those of us who have been through difficult times, while we value our experiences we don’t have to re-traumatize ourselves by over sharing to become believable when others question our trauma informed practice as can happen.
- I always think when asked “So what happened?” … My life isn’t a story for you to consume is what I may think but I don’t say that.
- Instead, I say “Thank you for your interest in my experiences. However as this is my personal experience, I’m choosing not to speak about it.
- While I am not always able to say this exactly as I have typed it here, due to power relations in the space I am in, I do my best to place boundaries when people get more curious than they need to.
- I am mindful of the impact this has on me although I understand their well intentioned questions.
- Also, we don’t have to ask people to recount their experiences by asking probing questions.
- Especially with children and young people, as well as families who are socialized and trained by life experiences to answer all questions directed to them due to power relations, it’s important to not ask questions that I/you wouldn’t be comfortable answering if they were directed to us.
Some Tips
- Examine your biases.
- Listen with empathy.
- Keep the conversation confidential always.
- Keep your meeting notes in secure spaces as per the guidelines of your school board.
- Speak to people within the school and school board who has the institutional responsibility to support the next steps needed to support the family and student or staff members.
- Remember that people’s stories shared in confidence aren’t for public consumption –> staff rooms, workrooms, hallways or social media are all public spaces.
- As educators, our role is to support and to find support. Never judge.
- Acknowledge that our talk becomes the official text when we write meeting summaries so read and revise language so that it pertains to students’ learning and well being, nothing else.
- Please read, share and implement ETFO’s Managing Current Events and Sensitive Issues: Tips for Members (Feb 2026).
- This is a very important resource for early career and experienced members alike. If colleagues in your schools have not seen this, do share.
Above all, Let Us Consider This…
Acknowledging humanity and the understanding that people have lived lives in other places before coming “here” is key.
Those who have ties to this land since times immemorial do not owe us their stories either. It is upto us to learn and demonstrate respect.
It is up to me/us to learn the history and look around right now to see what is unfolding.
Kindly reach out to the Mental Health Department in your school district for further support to engage with and strengthen Trauma Informed Practices.
Doing this work with others as a community based school-wide approach is very helpful as one is not alone and the learning is deeper and across all workspaces that provides a wrap around support.
With You, In Solidarity
Rashmee Karnad-Jani
